Review: Breast milk in a brew

Presleep the wife and I have a cup of decaf tea, maybe a cheeky biscuit. It’s our way of unwinding, talking the day over and planning the next day. Without it I don’t feel relaxed or that I’ve put the day to bed.

So last night when I flicked the kettle on, popped the tea bags in the cups and joyfully walked to the fridge I was disheartened to discover we were all out of soya milk. Not a drop.

Now it was 10pm, Sainsbury’s was still open but I was in my jimmy jams and could not build up the energy to get changed and venture out into the dark night to simply get more milk.

All seemed hopeless.  Until I noticed the bottle of expressed breast milk perched upon the top fridge shelf. It was from earlier that day when she left me for a day of galavanting whilst I played solo parent for 7 hours, the longest I’ve ever gone. I had successfully navigated this challenge but now needed to solve my lack of milk conundrum.

I therefore used the breast milk for my brew. And it was fantastic. Gave it that creamy taste I require, whilst reducing the temperature to a consumable degree. It held well, did not curdle, which some soya milks in my experience do, and looked the business. The brew tasted delightful and took a Hobnob successfully.

Nothing major. I am sure a number of people have done it before. Difference is I’ve not heard many people say they’ve tasted breast milk before, well as adults anyway. When I have heard it discussed people usually sound appalled at the idea. Never really understood why it was such a big deal.

Now I’m not saying that we should all go around trying random ladies breast milk or hook up hundreds of lactating mummies and start milking them for profit and consumer demand. What I am saying is that if you try your partners milk or use it for everyday purposes, maybe on your coco pops or in your brew is it that big a deal? I mean it is produced for human consumption and is full to the brim of fanastic properties. It’s readily available, aslong as your partner is producing it, it’s minimal carbon footprint means it’s beneficial to the environment and it’s free. Saved myself a journey to the shop and £1.40 simply by using it last night.

And whilst I am talking about breasts and how they can offend, why do so many people get all riled up other breastfeeding in public?

Doing something natural, that’s been done for thousands of years, gives a baby the essentials for healthy growth and development is seen by some as inappropriate when done in a public areana. We shouldn’t be ostracising women for breastfeeding in public. We should be encouraging it and supporting these ladies. We see so many funbags out there all greased up, getting bobbed around and motorboated and rarely bat an eyelid. So lets not get all squibbly when a mummy pops one out for function.

Mummies I got your back.

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